


Now or Never

by Sinistretoile



Category: Actor RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Porn, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cunnilingus, F/M, Fucking, Light Angst, Multiple Sex Positions, Porn, Porn with Feelings, Secret Relationship, Sex, Smut, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-22
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-11-03 12:04:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10966845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sinistretoile/pseuds/Sinistretoile
Summary: Emmy's tired of being the secret girlfriend, of feeling like the dirty little secret. But will Chris choose now or never?





	Now or Never

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Halsey 'Now or Never'  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzQTc0-iBX8

Emmy bit her lip as she watched Chris walk the red carpet. It was a beautiful thing. HE was a beautiful thing. She’d walked the red carpet too, but she wasn’t one of the main stars. She was supporting cast and not even one of the strong characters. This film wasn’t her launching pad, though a supporting role in a Marvel film looked fucking stellar on her resume.  
She sipped her drink but her eyes lingered on him for too long. He noticed. His eyebrow raised and she smiled. Hoping the distance between them hid her blush. She raised her glass in greeting. He gave her toothy smile and raised a wave in her direction. When he turned back to the press row, she high-tailed into the theater. And she completely missed him looking after her.  
The rum was going to way too smoothly. And it helped immensely that the bartender poured heavy because she was cast member. By the time the movie started, she had a decent buzz going on. She sat near the back, melting into the comfortable seat. Her phone vibrated a text alert. She pulled it out with the house lights still up. It was from Jeremy. She grinned.  
JR: Where you at?  
R: In the back.  
JR: Come up front with us.  
R: I’m fine back here.  
JR: Come on! You know you want to!  
He was right. She DID want to. To be recognized as one of the cast was a big deal.  
R: Fine, if there’s a seat.  
JR: Sure there is! You can sit next to me.  
Emmy laughed and stood up then hurried down to the front.  
“There you are! I missed you walking the red carpet.” Jeremy pulled her into a bear hug.  
“I got here early. I’m not an important arrival so no one gave a shit.”  
“Shut the fuck up.” She laughed. “Come sit.” Her heart leapt into throat even as it tried to pound of her chest. She couldn’t believe she was sitting next to these people that she looked up, fangirled over, and some even fantasized over. “You sit there. Emmy, you know Seb and Mackie.”  
“Red hot! You made it.”  
Emmy laughed. “Oh please don’t say that too loud.”  
Jeremy sat down as she leaned over and gave Mackie a hug then Sebastian. She bit her lip as they pulled away. Christ, how many times had she gotten off to the man who’d just touched her? The empty seat beside hers was filled when she sat down and settled back.  
“Hi.”  
Emmy met the bluest eyes she’d even seen. “Hi.” She breathed out. The house lights went down and they turned to the screen. His knee rested against hers. Chris put his arm on the arm rest. Emmy didn’t see his arm and laid it on top. She squeaked and pulled her arm back.  
He leaned over. “We can share.” They shared the armrest. His fingers began to caress her wrist and play with hers then they were holding hands. She couldn’t stop the goofy ass grin on her face. She bit her lip and only remembered half of the movie because he held her hand.

Her body hummed with arousal and the warm buzz of rum. Her back pressed up against the door to his hotel room. Chris’s thigh pushed between her legs as his tongue slipped between her lips. He tasted of Chivas and cigars. He captured her bottom lip between his teeth and pulled away.  
“You taste so fucking sweet. Like candy. I wonder if your pussy tastes as good.”  
“Chris.” She covered his mouth and he laughed. The door swung open and they stepped inside, Chris shutting the door behind them. He dropped to his knees and backed her up against the door. His hands slipped under her floor length gown and grasped the sides of her panties to draw them slowly down her legs. He tucked them in the pocket of his suit jacket.  
He gave her a playful grin the flipped up her skirt and disappeared beneath it. “Chris, I don’t think-“ His lips pressed to her thigh and she sighed. “Chris, get up.”  
“No.”  
“Chris, come on.” His mouth covered her mound, his tongue slipping between her swollen, juicy pussy lips. Emmy’s shoulders pressed into the door as her hips jutted out. He laughed against her then sucked her clit between his lips. He lapped at the sensitive nub, rolling it between his lips. Her hips bucked and she reached for his hair through her skirt. “Chris…”  
“What was that, baby?” He pushed two fingers into her as she opened her mouth to speak, causing her to make a strangled groan.  
“Bed?”  
“Cum for me and I’ll carry you to bed.” He sucked her clit back into his mouth, licking and sucking on it. His fingers pressed against her sweet spot. Her thighs trembled first then her body began to shake, his name a chant on her breath. He palmed himself through the suit trousers, the fabric cutting into his hard cock. He hooked her leg over his shoulder and pushed deeper, worrying her clit against her pubic bone.  
“Oh fuck! Right there! Don’t stop!” He hadn’t planned on it. He rubbed his fingers against her sweet spot until she screamed. Her leg thumped to the floor. Chris popped up and grabbed her around the torso and carried her to the bed.  
He trailed wet, eager kisses along her throat to her ear. “You looked so gorgeous tonight.” He kissed her earlobe. “I couldn’t wait to peel you out of this dress.” The zipper refused to budge.  
“Wait a second, I’ve got it.” No sooner had she spoke than the fabric ripped. “Chris.”  
“Sorry, I’ll buy you a new one.”  
Emmy laughed. “I’m never going to wear this dress anywhere else. Maybe to vacuum or fold laundry.”  
He laughed and cupped her face. “Then I’ll buy you another dress that you WILL wear.” He kissed her deep and slow. “And matching heels…” He worked the dress down until her breasts popped free. She wriggled out of the dress the rest of the way. He bent her back slightly so he could get at her breasts. “And matching bra and panties.”  
She lost her balance and dropped to the bed. He stood over her as he peeled the suit jacket off and tossed it. He kept eye contact with her as he loosened his tie then slid it off with a slithering sound that made her clench. He wrapped the tie around the back of her neck. He used the ends to pull her into a kiss. A deep and thorough kiss that curled her toes and stole her breath. A kiss that was surprisingly tender yet passionate and had her heart tripping over itself.  
Her eyes fluttered open as he slowly pulled away. “Wow…”  
Chris swallowed, searching her eyes. He dropped the tie then ran his thumb over her bottom lip. His gaze fixed on her lips then met her eyes. “I could kiss you like that forever.” Her heart tripped again. They’d always kept things light in the bedroom. Just friends with benefits. Excellent benefits that left her body sore and dehydrated. He kissed her again, pushing her back on the bed. He braced his knee against the mattress and urged her back more.  
Emmy scooted and broke the kiss. Chris unbuttoned the first few buttons then tugged the dress shirt and undershirt over his head and shoulders. “Fuck, you’re beautiful.” Her hands went to his well-defined abdomen then up over his chest.  
“That’s supposed to be my line.”  
“I can’t help it, Chris. Every time I see your body I’m amazed at how fucking beautiful you are.” He blushed. “And not just your body.” She grabbed for his waistband and pulled him closer, opening her legs more. He climbed the rest of the way on the bed and her lips touched his belly. “But your heart and soul. Your humor and your kindness.” She kissed lower and lower. She scraped her teeth at the waistband of his jeans against his belly, making his cock jump in his trousers.  
“Damn, babe, you’ve got me blushing.” Before she could say anything, he kissed her again, making quick work of the trousers while their tongues entwined. “You’re still on the pill, right?”  
“Never miss a day.”  
“Good.” She felt his fingers against her folds then the head of his cock at her entrance. She gasped at the first thrust, stretching for him. They both moaned with the second, burying him in to the hilt. He wrapped her legs around his waist and kissed her again before resting his forehead on hers. “Fuck, baby, you feel so fucking good.”  
He didn’t let her respond; kissing her again as he began to move, slow and deep, feeling everything. His open mouth hovered over hers, their breath mixing and making her light headed. Chris wrapped his arms underneath her then sat up on his heels, bringing her with him.  
“Oh god, Chris…” She arched her back, bracing her feet on the bed as she bounced on his dick, driving him deeper. He pressed his face to her sternum. He imagined he could hear her heart beating out of her chest.  
“Let go, baby. I got you.” He kissed her pulse and held her tighter and over she went. Her legs stiffened and she clung to him harder. Her clenching body shoved him over the edge. He gritted his teeth and held her down for the last few thrusts of his release. He dropped them to the side, positioning her on his chest.  
Emmy panted, listening to his hammering heart. His fingertips danced down her spine. Her eyelids grew heavy. He tucked his arm under his head, letting her doze. His alarm blared on his phone from somewhere across the room. He snapped awake, groaning at the stiffness in his arm.  
“Emmy. Emmy, wake up. You gotta go to your room.”  
She breathed in through her nose, waking up hard. A sob left her chest. “Fuck, Chris, just let me sleep.” She pushed off him and dropped to the empty side of the bed, pulling the covers around her.  
He sighed and rubbed his hands down his face. He was afraid this would happen. He curled his body around hers, giving her more warmth. “You gotta get up, baby. Hiddleston will be up in a little bit and you might run into him in the hall.”  
She groaned then threw the covers off. “Fine.” She sat up, so tired she wanted to cry. She didn’t understand how they could do these promo tours. She never felt rested. And she wasn’t even doing anything important other than being there as part of Marvel. Emmy searched the floor with one eye open for her panties then remembered they were in his pocket.  
“I wanted to keep those.”  
“Oh well.” She tugged them on then grabbed her dress. Again, she remembered that he’d broke the zipper and dropped it to the floor, going for her shoes.  
“Don’t be such a grouch, babe.”  
“Says the one who woke me up.”  
“Our flight doesn’t leave for 8 more hours. That’s plenty of time to sleep.” She managed to get the second heel on and fastened.  
“That’s not the point, Chris.”  
He rolled up to sit on the edge of the bed. “Then what is the point?”  
She picked up the dress and huffed out. “What are we doing, Chris? I mean really? What are we doing?”  
“Right now, we’re arguing.”  
“Fuck off, Evans, you know what I mean.” He rubbed his hands down his face. “We’ve been fucking on the regular for how many years now? We’ve met each other’s families. We’ve spent holidays together.” She held up her hand. “Correction, I’ve spent holidays with you and your family ‘as a friend’.” She made quotes in the air. “We have fun together. We laugh and talk. We’re great together. So I’m gonna ask this again. What are we doing, Chris?”  
He sighed. “Emmy, I think you’re overreacting.”  
“And I don’t, Chris.” She pulled her phone from his inner breast pocket where he’d held it for her. “I keep hoping that you’ll see what’s in front of your face. I keep hoping that when you kiss me like you did and say things like ‘I could kiss you like that forever’ that you really fucking mean it. But then you wake me up so I can sneak back to my room like a dirty fucking little secret and I realize rather painfully that we’re just fucking. We aren’t even friends.”  
“Whoa! That’s bullshit.” He stood up as she crossed her arms over her chest. “You know I care about you.”  
“But I –love- you, Chris.” She sighed and dropped her arms. “And I can’t do this anymore. I could see your point if we’d just started this. But this is three years now, Chris. Three years we’ve been sneaking around and pretending. And I’m tired of pretending.” Her throat closed and tears stung her eyes. “I’m tired of loving someone who doesn’t love me. So it’s now or never. You either stop treating me like a dirty little secret or I stop BEING the dirty little secret.” She turned to leave and he grabbed her wrist, but she twisted out of it.  
“Emmy, wait.”  
“I’ll see you at the airport.”  
Chris watched her go. He wanted to stop her. To tell her she was right. But he hated being given ultimatums and if she gave him one, she’d give him another.

The car pulled up to the curb at the airport. It was one in a long line of Marvel stars boarding for the next premiere. Emmy climbed out and followed the valet with her luggage. She saw Chris with Pratt and Sebastian. They looked at each other a moment before Emmy shook her head and moved further away. She sat on the nearest seat to her in within the group, resting her head in her hands. She was still slightly hungover and not looking forward to the flight. Not to mention the fight with Chris had her stomach twisted up in knots.  
She looked up as Hiddleston sat down next to her. “Emmy, you ok?” She shook her head. “Too much rum?” She nodded. His laugh made her smile at the floor. “Need me to get you anything?”  
She shook her head then sat back. “I’ll get a bottle of water and some ibuprofen on the plane then sleep the flight.”  
“You’re sure?”  
She smiled weakly. “I’m sure. Thanks, Tom.” He leaned forward and tucked her hair behind her ear then got up and squeezed her shoulder as he left her alone. She lay back on the chair, covering her eyes against the bright light of the airport.  
A throat cleared in front of her. Emmy peeked out from under her hand. “Take these and drink this.” Chris had an open bottle of water and packet of ibuprofen. She sighed as she leaned forward and plucked the pills from his hand. She looked at him as she tore the package then dumped them into her mouth. She took the water from him and washed them down then handed it back.  
“Thanks.” She lay back on the chair, covering her eyes again.  
“So you’re not even gonna talk to me?”  
“I’m tired and hungover, Chris. And I said everything I needed to say this morning. I’m not in the mood for small talk so if you want to have an engaging conversation, you’re in the wrong place.” She popped her eye open. “There are at least twenty people in the immediate vicinity who are more awake and coherent than I am right now.”  
Chris looked around and sighed then sat down next to her. She groaned and rolled away from him. “Don’t be childish.”  
“You have no right to tell me what to do, Chris. We’re not lovers. We’re not even friends.” She stood. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I’m gonna go cry and throw up.” She covered her mouth and ran for the bathroom. When she came out of the stall, Scarlett waited for her.  
“You ok?”  
“Not really.” She rinsed her mouth. “I think I’m gonna change my ticket. I’ll talk to Tony. My role isn’t even that big. Surely he’ll let me go home.”  
“Is that what you want?”  
“I think that’s what’s best.”  
Scarlett tucked the hair behind her ear. “You know he loves you, right? Everyone can see.”  
Emmy took a shaky breath. “Everyone but him.” Scarlett pulled her into a tight hug that made her cry even more. She managed to get a grip on herself and washed her face then rinsed out her mouth with mouthwash so she didn’t taste rum and vomit.  
Scarlett stayed with her until she was sure Emmy was ok then left her alone. Emmy looked in the mirror and shuddered. She looked like shit. Which was fitting since she felt like shit. She stepped out of the bathroom and Chris wasn’t where she’d left him. Why would he be? She trudged to retrieve her carry-on where she’d left it then went to find the Russos.  
Emmy cleared her throat behind Anthony’s back. “Excuse me, sir?”  
“Yes, Emmy?”  
“I’m not feeling myself and I think it would be best if I changed my ticket and just went home.”  
“Are you sure? This could be great exposure for you.”  
She shrugged. “Not sure how great it would be if I looked and felt awful.”  
“Ok, kiddo, go ahead and change your ticket. If you decide to join us at any of the other premieres, shoot me an email and I’ll get you a ticket.”  
“Thank you, sir.” She turned around and right into Chris, his perfect blue eyes wide in fear and concern, bordering on panic. “Chris?” While Emmy had been talking to Tony Russo, Scarlett had made a beeline for Chris and informed him of Emmy’s intention to go home. That ‘now or never’ had sat in his gut all morning and afternoon. At the mention of Emmy leaving the press tour, that ‘now or never’ shoved him into action.  
“I love you. You can’t leave. Don’t leave.” Chris wasn’t one for public displays of affection, especially in airports but he took the sides of her face and kissed her, hard and needful. “I’ll take now because the thought of never kills me.”  
Emmy smiled and wrapped her arms around his shoulders as he came in for another kiss. His thumb caressed her soft skin under her shirt and her fingers went into his hair. He rested his forehead on hers. “No more dirty little secret.”  
He grinned. “I hope we can keep a little dirty.”  
“Oh a lot dirty, Mr. Evans.” He belly laughed and carried her over to bank of seats where Scarlett and Mackie waited with the carry-ons.


End file.
